But, to be perfectly honest, not unpredictable.
I was unfriended on Facebook by someone that I’ve known for over 50 years tonight, and I have to be honest, it still kinda stings. But it was her choice in the end, since I’m not one to unfriend people unless they richly deserve it.
Ultimately, it came down to politics, as a lot of these things these days seem to be. She’s a dyed in the wool Republican, I’m a Democrat. This wasn’t the first time we didn’t see eye to eye on a political subject, but as it turned out, it was the last. I shared an ad that was posted in the NY Times a few days ago to my feed with the caveat that it was something I supported, I respected if you didn’t but if you were going to comment to keep the tone civil. Not too much to ask, one would think.
I received a few likes and loves on the post, a friend commented that the country (US) was “founded on the basis of racism, religious prejudice, and greed. To say otherwise is either blindness or falsehood. If it does not stand, it is because it is not worthy to stand.” As a student of history, I disagree with some of that statement, but not enough to make a deal of it. So I didn’t engage with her.
Jane on the other hand (not her real name) came out swinging. She accused me of ‘attacking Trump’ and not being ashamed of the actions of the Democrats on the floor of the House the previous evening. Obviously forgetting wholeheartedly how her fellow Republicans would act when either President Biden or President Obama was speaking at any joint session of Congress. Clearly the Dems are the bad actors because they didn’t applaud voraciously no matter what Trump said during the speech. In closing, she stated that if I was going to be so bad (and apparently clueless) a person, then perhaps it was time for me to unfriend her and we go our separate ways.
I chose to be the bigger person. I told her quite unequivocally that I wasn’t attacking her guy at all, I was merely reposting something that I agreed with, and she might wish to read it, instead of just hitting me over the head with rhetoric. Even so, I went on to say that Mr. Trump has proved time and again that he doesn’t really care about anyone other than himself, and his main goal at any point in time has been to enrich himself and his family at the expense of everyone else. He expects loyalty from all, but gives none to anyone else. That’s been his modus operandi from the beginning of his political career, when he was (tada, wait for it) a Democrat. He switched sides when he discovered that he wasn’t getting anywhere with the party heads, and wasn’t going to be a candidate since he didn’t have any relevant experience with political office. As it turned out, the Republicans didn’t care if that was the case, as long as you brought money with you when you signed up to be one of their guys.
At that point things went off the rails. She basically shut down and said that I was misinformed and that she felt sad for me. I went to ask what I was misinformed about, but there was no response because she had removed herself from the conversation by unfriending me.
Jane and I have been friends from school for over 50 years. She was a year or so ahead of me in school and we’d gotten along really well up until a few years ago. I’m sorry that she couldn’t overcome the differences, but as many of my current friends have mentioned, perhaps it’s for the best. One even suggested I block her on FB, but I’m not going to do that. Not my style. However, if she comes back at some point asking to be re-friended, I’m not certain I’m going to do that either. That’s also part of my style. It’s up to you to leave. If you do, I’m not likely to let you back in after you’ve calmed down and rethought your actions. My time is precious and I’m not going to waste it on someone that tosses aside a long term friendship because of something this inane.
Bye Jane, I hope you have a good rest of your life.