So long as I’ve been married; there have been set determinations of who does what with our hierarchy. I cook, she cleans (as necessary). I pay for the utilities and food, she pays/paid for the mortgage (and now taxes on the paid property), the car and other big ticket items (for the majority of our marriage she was the breadwinner). As always, there are exceptions; like when I made full time(again) in 2010 and bought a dishwasher, because we badly needed one, (the one that came with the house broke within the first several months and thereafter was used as storage) and I liked to be able to purchase something of value and not have to wait for her to do it for us.
With the back surgery, all of that took a detour. Post-surgery restrictions stated that she wasn’t to be doing any unnecessary lifting and/or twisting and bending, to help her back heal. So right there excised 75% of what she had been doing while I was at work. At least we have a dishwasher for the dishes, cookware and so on. We’ve had a washer/dryer combo for as long as we’ve lived here at this house, so I don’t have to take the laundy to a laundramat. That at least helps. I’ve had to rely on my collegiate laundry experience a lot more in the past 2 weeks than I have in the previous 40 years. Of course back then we didn’t have agitator-less washers, but that’s just a bump in the road. Learning how the washer works is small potatoes when it comes to that. I’m already pretty well versed in the cleaning arts in other ways, just have to drag out the tools and get things accomplished.
The other unexpected benefit is that it keeps me moving on my days off, and not planted in front of the tv feeding my face incessantly. Today for instance, I’ve already shoveled the front walk and sidewalk, the driveway (I thought about using the snowblower, but there really wasn’t enough of the white stuff to bother) and run the dishwasher as well as taken care of two loads of laundry. And I’m on my second blog post of the day. Meanwhile, it’s been spitting and sputtering snow outside. I still have to figure out dinner, as well as get some supplies from the store (we’re not out of anything vitally important, but there are a few things that we could use in the short term that we’re running low on) or maybe not. I do work in a grocery store, so I could get the items tomorrow after work, and not ruin this nice warm feeling after my shower. Yeah, I think I’ll do that. It’s fairly cold outside right now and I’m not feeling like braving it.
It’s a learning curve, but I’m ok with it. We don’t have children, so I don’t have to deal with hurdles like getting kids to school, after school activities and so on. We don’t go out anywhere except for appointments for the most part, so that’s another thing that doesn’t change. The cat is pretty easy to manage, as long as she’s fed and has a place to sleep and do her bathroom business, she’s set.
I’ve actually been contemplating using the time to do some deep cleaning in the house that’s drastically overdue. The very recent passing of our chiropractor (who was my age) has got me thinking about the future, and how it would leave her if suddenly I wasn’t in the picture. The house alone would be insurmountable, especially for someone who is older than myself. Making it easier for her if (heaven forbid) that might happen isn’t a bad idea. I already dragged out the vacuum upstairs and attacked cobwebs that hadn’t been touched in years. (Decades, to be brutally honest) At one time we had a cleaning lady and she did a really good job. We have a robot vacuum, but it only works if it has a clear path to run, and quite often it gets stuck behind and around things that block its way. That needs to change, if nothing else. The garage is still a disaster, and needs squaring away. I promised myself I’d do it before winter, but here we are at the cusp of the New Year and the car sits outside getting snowed on.
I’m not a resolution sort of guy, but this seems a bit like a resolution sort of thing. At the very least it’s a goal. So here it is: I resolve to get half the house in order by Spring. Let’s see how I do.
Happy 2026.